I am new to the forum. This is my first time posting a sample. This the beginning of a Doctor Who strip (Capaldi era) I’m hoping to submit to Panini UK for Doctor Who magazine. I will post more once I have it. It starts off slow on the first page but that’s for a reason.
Any feedback / critique would be appreciated.
The Dalek Singularity - Issue 1, Part 1 of 2 - By Stuart Scott
Page 1 (4 panels)
Panel 1 – We see Tardis from the above and behind. It is resting at the top of a small incline leading up from an idyllic unpopulated beach. Glorious sunshine is blazing from twin suns. At the bottom of the incline are the Doctor (dressed in his normal attire) and Clara (dressed like she has come from a beach, sunhat sandals etc.)
CLARA: I CANNOT BELIEVE THE WHOLE TIME WE’VE BEEN HERE YOU’VE NOT SO MUCH AS TAKEN YOUR SHOES OFF.
DOCTOR: IT’S THE SAND, IT MAY LOOK LOVELY BUT IT GETS EVERYWHERE. MAKE SURE YOU DON’T WALK IT INTO THE TARDIS, SHE WON’T THANK YOU FOR IT.
Panel 2 – Same shot except the Doctor and Clara are further up the incline now more details are visible. Clara is looking around in wonder, Doctor is looking smug.
CLARA: I’M GLAD I GOT TO SEE ELYSIUM LIKE THIS. AFTER THE BOMBARDMENT BY THE H.M.S.S FLYDALE NORTH I THOUGHT I’D MISSED THE OPPORTUNITY.
DOCTOR: WHAT’S THE POINT OF A TIME MACHINE IF YOU CANNOT VISIT THE GALAXIES BEAUTY SPOTS BEFORE THEY ARE DEVELOPED-- (muttered) OR RAZED BY OVERZEALOUS IMPERIALISTS.
Panel 3 – Same shot but now the pair are at the top of the incline the Doctor is gesturing out at the horizon whilst Clara is half paying attention whilst unlocking the Tardis.
DOCTOR: ARE YOU SURE YOU DON’T WANT TO STAY ANY LONGER? THERE ARE STILL 2 MORE CONTINENTS TO EXPLORE.
CLARA: AS TEMPTING AS THAT SOUNDS I COULD DO WITH A SHOWER AND A BIT OF EXC—
Panel 4 – Close up on Clara from the inside of the Tardis she is now looking into the open doorway of the Tardis shocked / scared. The Doctor is visible behind her also shocked. What they are looking at is not visible.
DALEK TZU (op Dalek font):
RETURNING TO THE TARDIS AFTER A BREAK ON THE LEISURE PLANET OF ELYSIUM THE DOCTOR AND CLARA DISCOVER AN UNEXPECTED GUEST.
Page 2 (4 panels)
Panel 1 – We see silhouettes of Doctor (dressed normally) and Clara (dressed like she has come from a beach, sunhat sandals etc.) in foreground standing in the Tardis doorway looking into the Tardis shocked. Between them we see DALEK TZU an aged Dalek commander standing in front of the central control panel facing them. This guy is worn, decorated from numerous battles. He has been around for a long time, imagine a steampunk style Dalek. He fought WITH the Doctor during the time war as comrades in arms. Give him some personality. He will appear throughout this arc. We want to give readers the impression that this potential enemy has somehow gotten into the Tardis and has introduced a threat to this this otherwise tranquil scene. However DALEK TZU has a slight blueish hue to indicate he is a hologram.
THEIR REVELRY CUT SHORT BY A GHOST FROM THE DOCTORS PAST.
Panel 2 – We see the reaction of the Doctor and Clara. Clara is looking uncomfortable at her attire when in presence of potential foe hiding herself. The Doctor is shielding Clara behind himself whilst holding out the sonic screwdriver.
THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE. YOU CAN’T BE HERE?
Panel 3 – Dalek Commander looms over Doctor and Clara.
YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE GOOD AT SUR-VIVE-ING.
HOW IS IT HERE?
Panel 4 – Full on shot of Dalek Tzu. Blue tint is more pronounced we can now see that he is being broadcast from a holo emitter on the ceiling of the Tardis central column. The Doctor is inspecting it with sonic screwdriver whilst Clara has a closer look at the Dalek poking into the hologram.
HE IS NOT HERE, HE’S A HOLOGRAM. PERFECTLY SAFE… I THINK.
I GOT THAT, BUT DOESN’T THE TARDIS BLOCK UNWANTED CALLS?
NOT WHEN THE CALLER HAS OUR NUMBER.
REALISATION THAT THEIR GUEST IS NOT A THREAT REPLACES FEAR WITH CURIOUSITY.
Page 3 (5 panels)
Panel 1 – Clara looking at the Doctor (off panel) quizzically, Dalek Tzu is behind her. She has turned her back to it, obviously no longer intimidated.
THE UNIVERSE IS…
CLARA (cutting off Tzu):
WHAT DO YOU MEAN HAS OUR NUMBER, IT’S A DALEK? YOU HATE DALEKS.
Panel 2 – Doctor looks coy wrinkled up face and shrugging with hands raised.
IT’S A LONG STORY, AND SOME OF THEM ARE ALRIGHT.
Panel 3 – Doctor returns their attention to Dalek Tzu by indicating him with outstretched arms thus giving him the floor.
THE DOCTOR (To Dalek):
NOW, WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT THE UNIVERSE?
Panel 4 – Dalek commander looking intimidating.
THE UNIVERSE IS IN GRAVE DANGER. YOU MUST ASSIST THE DALEKS.
Panel 5 – Clara and Doctors reaction to the news. Both slightly perplexed. Clara is speaking conspiratorially to the Doctor behind her hand.
CLARA (To doctor):
…THEY KNOW WHO YOU ARE RIGHT?
Page 4 (5 panels)
Panel 1 – The hologram of Dalek Tzu looks somewhat patheric. It’s eye piece, laser and plunger are lowered, perhaps with wavy lines to indicate the plunger quaking in fear.
(Quivering like scared) THE DALEK SINGULARITY CANNOT BE CONTAINED. QUARANTINE IS FUTILE. MASS EXTERMINATION IMMINENT. EQUILIBRIUM MUST BE RESTORED. WILL… YOU… HELP… US…?
Panel 2 – Doctor gestures over his shoulder with his thumb at another corner of the Tardis control room, Clara is standing next to him looking intrigued.
HMM, TEMPTING REQUEST, JUST GIVE ME A MOMENT TO CONSULT WITH MY COLLEAGUE.
Panel 3 – Doctor and Clara now have their backs to Dalek Tzu who can still be seen in the background. They are hunched together conspiratorially.
WELL THAT’S NEW…
HE SEEMS SCARED. AND TO MY KNOWLEDGE THERE’S ONLY ONE THING IN THE UNIVERSE THAT SCARES DALEKS…
Panel 4 – Close up of Doctors eyes looking quite sinister;
LET ME GUESS…
Panel 5 – Clara and Doctor both looking over their shoulders at Dalek Tzu. Clara has a sympathetic expression. Doctor looks excited at this new puzzle.
WHICH BEGS THE QUESTION, WHAT CAN GET THEM SCARED ENOUGH TO CALL YOU FOR HELP?
INDEED, THEY MUST BE DESPERATE.
Page 5 (5 panels)
Panel 1 – View of a stark industrial looking Dalek R&D facility based within an asteroid, lots of jutting pylons and dishes. Whilst we cannot see it yet this facility has an artificial black hole at its centre so the asteroid needs to be big enough to accommodate this. The asteroid is in orbit above a similarly a stark looking Dalek manufacturing world. Both will appear throughout this arc. The Tardis is flying towards a hanger deck in the side of the asteroid base ignored by passing Dalek patrol ships.
“…We’ll do it!”
THE DOCTOR (coming out of Tardis):
WELL THIS IS NICE. WHY DIDN’T WE COME HERE FOR VACATION?
CLARA (coming out of Tardis):
PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE JOKING!
Panel 2 - The TARDIS parked in the middle of a DALEK hanger deck on the asteroid base. In the distance Dalek patrol craft can be seen through an entrance to space. Leading from the Tardis to the hangers exit are an impressive uniform display of Daleks lined up in a ceremonial fashion with different colours and styles in different positions across the hanger deck (like Emperors arrival on Death Star in Star Wars ROTJ). Waiting outside the Tardis to greet the Doctor is the Dalek subcommander, a black contemporary Dalek that needs to have something distinctive about him to stand out from others they will encounter.
UNABLE TO MATERIALISE WITHIN THE DALEKS BASE THE DOCTOR TAKES THE TARDIS IN MANUALLY
Panel 3 – View from behind Doctor and Clara standing in the open doorway of the Tardis looking out over the congregation. Clara has changed into something more suitable.
LOOKS LIKE THEY PUT ON A WELCOMING PARTY.
YEAH, WHAT’S TO STOP THEM EXTERMINATING US THE FIRST CHANCE THEY GET?
Panel 4 – Panel 2 image but with Doctor and Clara standing at entrance to the Tardis.
DALEKS (all together):
Panel 5 – The pair have ventured out from the Tardis to be greeted by Dalek Subcommander. Clara is looking around in fascination. Doctor is all business.
YOU WILL COME TO NO HARM. YOUR PRESENCE IS REQUESTED. YOU WILL FOLLOW.
That’s it for now. I’m aiming to get the last pages of issue one up later this week or early next.