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Write Off 6: Origin of Spider-Man


#62

Yeaaaahhhh

You need to write that and enter it.

Edit: Because I really want to read it!


#63

I like that explanation of this a lot. That’s exactly the goal. Your style is your voice. It’s exactly like your twist.


#64

Ok, I’ll slap something together and throw it at Young John Wayne.


#65

With the original story, the twist was that Ben’s killer was the thief that Peter chose not to stop.

Of course, we’re so familiar with the story now that it doesn’t feel like a twist. So maybe you need a twist on the twist. :slight_smile:


#66

Okay, pilgrim.


#67

#68

Ideally not a twist that completely destroys the point of the origin, though. :slight_smile:


#69

There’s a similar story/anime about Batman like this. Instead it’s little skateboarder kids each talking about their experience meeting Batman.


#70

I seem to recall that. Was one of the stories like BATMAN in DARK KNIGHT RETURNS?

When I saw the Burton BATMAN, I liked that he started out an urban legend like The Moth Man that no one really believed existed. It’s a good approach and I think creepypasta would be a genre that could provide new ideas for comics characters the way b movie monsters like The Colossal Man and The Fly influenced The Hulk and Spider-Man.


#71

Believe me, I want to tell stories like that.


#72

One month to go!

One month left to polish those scripts and PM them to me!

Don’t be bashful!


#73

Origins? Well there’s origins and origins.

Sure Spiderman’s real name is Peter Parker but the story begins way before that.

1306 to be precise, in a cave on an Irish island.

There sat a much beleaguered Scottish King, on the run from a homeland in the process of being annexed by England.

To Robert the Bruce, with much of his country now overrun by the troops of Edward I, aka ‘Longshanks’, things didn’t look too good.

In fact he was in two minds whether to give up the defence of his realm or carry on.

As he sat in his gloomy quandary, he espied a spider hanging on a long thread from the roof of the cave. As he watched, he could see it was trying to swing over to a rock so it could start to create its web.

Six times it swung and failed to reach the rock. Robert had suffered six defeats at the hands of the English. Suddenly it dawned on him. If the spider made it on the seventh attempt, he would carry on the fight.

Of course, the spider did make it and the rest is, quite literally, history. After many battles, he finally secured his country’s independence at Bannockburn.

Unbeknownst to Robert, the Sidhe, a magical race rather like Elves or Fairies and who lived inside the hill which was home to the cave in question, observed this with great interest and regarded it to be of the utmost significance in their scheme of things

They resolved that the principal of justice which was born of this interaction between a human and a spider should be preserved somehow to aid a future generation of humanity.

So, the very next changeling child they acquired, they imbued with the potential for both the bravery and sense of injustice of the human involved and the determination and special skills of the spider.

However, they judged that there would be little point in those powers being immediately enacted at that time but would be more sensibly invoked at some future point of greater World need. Their seers, after long deliberation, judged that the moment of greatest need in the future of humanity, would be after the harnessing of nuclear power.

So it was decided, that genes would be created within the changeling which would require radioactivity to trigger the powers they held.

And so it was done. Generation after generation of descendants from that changeling child came and went until finally, in the New World, a child was born, Peter Parker, in whom those powers would come to fruition.

Incidentally, that first changeling child was called Arthur O’Pod.


#74

Could you put this in comic book script form?


#75

Moi? Don’t think I have the relevant expertise.

How is a typical comic script structured?


#76

A lot of duct tape is usually involved.


#77

Besides duct tape (which is literally useful in every regard), here’s a brief outline:

PAGE 1

Panel 1
BeingHenning types on a keyboard. He is looking at a computer (or a tiny, tiny phone screen), concentrating. On the screen you can see that he’s typed, “A lot of duct tape is usually involved.”

CAPTION: BeingHenning was being helpful, as always.

BEINGHENNING: Hee hee hee!

Panel 2
BeingHenning smiles directly at the reader.

BEINGHENNING: It’s all true!

There are plenty of variations to how a script looks, but generally that’s the archetype. The way you wrote your initial story, you could use most of that in captions, if you’d like, and then come up with images for individual panels, and maybe some dialogue to toss in, funny little Spider-Man quips or whatever.

The beauty of Write Off is that no matter how it can sometimes seem it’s the experience that’s really the point, not winning or losing. You get to find out, good and bad, what other people think of your script-writing ability, and decide if you’ll take their reaction to heart. You’ll find that you’ll be a better writer if you do (regardless of how you may react in the moment), which doesn’t mean that you’ll do everything they suggest, but that you’ll at least look for ways to improve in the future.


#78

See the main criticism of the above script is that BeingHenning is described as “concentrating” and has a word bubble in the same panel where he’s going, “Hee hee hee!” Clearly the writer should’ve either told the artist that BeingHenning is concentrating and smiling mischievously, or merely asking him to be depicted as a deranged lunatic. Either one, really.:slight_smile:


#79

Wondering what potential participants may be up to, if they might be struggling, and what I might do to help.


#80

I’m wondering if @eileenodonnell123, @hguarderas, @PlutonianKnight, @Fledgling, @JRCarter, @thenerdlifechoseme, @ParkerMcCombe, @Hazardpay, even @chicmac (who I was just chatting with a few weeks ago) are needing any encouragement, assuming they’re still considering participating. And anyone else, of course. Twenty-one days, still plenty of time, left to go. Extensions are possible if you need them.


#81

This is the most considerate thing anyone has ever said to me on the internet. :slight_smile:I wrote out a few pages of something I know isn’t right: I tweaked the origin, i summerized the things I didnt have time show, and Spidey isn’t exactly the same because of those changes. Same powers, similar origin, different mindset. I think it’s interesting,but it doesn’t fit the criteria. It occours to me that ye old marvel staff had to do this type of thing constantly. Retell the origin story for anyone that doesn’t already know it…I picture guys like JM DeMatteis sweating the same problem…Haha kindred spirits, right? But your encouragement is very touching. Thank you. I will think it over some more. Thanks again, Hazard.