Ended up writing two scripts for the Millarworld Annual competition. Submitted the other one, figured I might as well post this one here where someone might enjoy it.
1/ Close on Duke.
CAPTION: People. Like em’ or hate 'em, they’re all pretty much the same.
DUKE: Fella’s, let’s not do anything stupid.
2/ Pull back. He’s on a crazy alien pirate ship, in the middle of a showdown with about fifteen armed, hostile alien pirates. All he has is a harpoon gun.
CAPTION: More or less.
CAPTAIN: We’re a long way past stupid, Duke McQueen.
3/ Pull back further. Duke looks behind them. The ship is being chased by a huge sea monster.
CAPTION: Doesn’t matter if you’re a crashed airforce pilot or some kind of crazy alien pirate.
DUKE: Yeah, maybe you’re right.
4/ Duke fires his harpoon gun out of shot.
DUKE: May as well do something downright idiotic.
5/ We pull back even further. Spreading huge wings, the sea monster launches into the air, with Duke trailing beneath it on the end of his harpoon line. The pirate ship launches off a waterfall that makes Niagra Falls look like a dripping tap.
Tantalus stretches off into the distance, wonderful and strange.
CAPTION: All anyone really wants is to go home.
1/ All black.
CAPTION: I dream about baseball.
2/ A yawning cavern, strangely lit, piled with magnificent alien treasures. The centre of the cavern is a deep pool of water, Duke has washed up against its shore, and lies on his back on diamond sand, water lapping at his legs, only just waking up. There are no visible exits.
CAPTION: I’d give a year of my life to see a man hit a ball with a stick.
DUKE: Where the hell am I now?
3/ As Duke climbs to his feet, a woman appears, old and alien, wise in long crimson robes, floating a few feet above the ground, ethereal.
CURATOR: Welcome to the Cavern of Lost and Found, Duke McQueen. I am The Curator.
DUKE: Let me guess, I’m one of the lost things.
4/ Duke looks around.
5/ Duke looks up at The Curator.
DUKE: The Cavern of Lost and Found smells.
1/ Duke starts sifting through the treasure, looking for anything useful. The Curator floats behind him.
DUKE: So what are you, a hologram? A ghost?
CURATOR: Do you believe in ghosts?
DUKE: Who knows? I never used to believe in little green men. Last week I was best man at a little green wedding.
2/ Duke picks something out of a pile and holds it up to inspect.
CURATOR: Think of me as… a guide.
DUKE: No riddles.
CURATOR: Excuse me?
3/ Duke tosses the thing aside. The Curator floats behind him, unsure what to make of this.
DUKE: I’ve met people like you. You always want to be mysterious and enigmatic. Well I have rule. No riddles.
4/ Duke pulls a chair out of a pile and inspects it. The Curator acquiesces.
CURATOR: As you wish.
5/ Duke sits down on the chair, facing The Curator.
DUKE: Alright then, let’s do this.
1/ The Curator struggles to be specific under Duke’s stern gaze.
CURATOR: This is a cavern of the lost, but also of the…
DUKE: No riddles.
CURATOR: Sometimes it is when all seems lost that we…
DUKE: No riddles.
CURATOR: Nothing can ever truly be lost, so long as…
2/ Close on Duke as he raises an eyebrow.
3/ The Curator relents, deflated.
CURATOR: Sigh. I can send you home.
4/ Duke leaps to his feet, knocking his chair over.
DUKE: To Earth?
CURATOR: To where you belong. To her.
DUKE: No ri-
CURATOR: To Earth, yes.
5/ Baseball. A batter hitting the ball.
6/ The Curator shows Duke an elaborately decorated door.
CURATOR: This door will take you anywhere you desire. But you can only step through it once.
1/ Duke stares at the door, conflicted.
CURATOR: Why do you hesitate?
2/ Rows of cages, full of magical creatures, beaten and unhappy.
3/ Slaves, being whipped by cruel guards.
4/ Attala stands on a balcony, watching a city burn.
5/ To her surprise, Duke takes his place next to her.
PRINCESS: Duke! How did you… Where have you…
PRINCESS: We thought you were gone.
6/ The fire is reflected in Duke’s eyes, lighting his face.
DUKE: Can’t go anywhere until I’ve put this out.