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Star Wars: The Force Awakens - discussion (SPOILERS!!!)


It’s finally here! The Premiere of Star Wars: The Force Awakens takes place today and it’s opening in various territories throughout this week, so I thought it was worth having a place where it can be discussed in full once people are ready - to give us somewhere to talk about anything spoilery and keep it out of all the other threads.

I hope everyone enjoys it!

Star Wars movie thread (NO SPOILERS)
Star Wars movie thread (NO SPOILERS)
Star Wars movie thread (NO SPOILERS)

Anybody up for spoiler tagging a bunch of predictions for the film and coming back and seeing how right or wrong we were?


R2D2 is BB-8’s father.


Right, how do you blur stuff? I can’t work it out


Put the word “spoiler” between [ and ], then write text, and then [/ , again the word “spoiler” and then ]


Now I know that I can write my prediction that Finn’s full name is Finn Calrissian and the entire plot of episode VIII will revolve around the new heroes going to find Lando for some reason, apart from Rey who’s off to train with Luke.

I feel like I’ve levelled up


The Millenium Falcon toy I just bought nephew has figures on Finn and Chewie. No Han Solo. I deduce Han gets killed off. The villain is going to be Luke who has given into the dark side.


Yeah, I think everyone is pretty sure now that Han’s in the Obi-Wan role. I can’t see Luke being Dark Side, to be honest. My main reason for this is that he’s with R2 who is thee most heroic and ‘good’ character in the whole narrative. Can’t see him rolling with a Sith.


Han will be revealed as Jar Jar Binks after speech therapy and extensive plastic surgery, further ruining his bad ass image.

It’ll turn out Luke was absent from the trailers for no particular reason and is always just off camera in all the trailer’s shots, but present through the entire film.

Leia will reveal that she tried to become a Jedi, but failed, cos she’s a girl and isn’t even Luke’s sister at all, because he had literally no way of working that out correctly in RotJ.

Boba Fett will arrive to save the day and reveal himself to be Mara Jade, before the film is interrupted, Gremlins 2 style, by someone pointing out that she’s not canon any more.

Due to all this, the film will make about $3 billion gross box office.


I think it will end with like Luke killing Han.

No, seriously.


Luke will go back in time and kill Han BUT then Future Jedi Knight BB88 will go back in time to that moment and kill Luke thus preventing the dark side from taking over Jar Jar Junior and thus saving the universe but Doctor Who stiill has to teleport the universe into an alternate universes pocket universe.


Clara’s not going to be in this Tim, let it go.





Han will be killed…by Luke’s hand. Luke’s right hand will turn to the Dark side. It will turn out the hand never let go of the lightsaber when it was cut off in Bespin, so the hand will go on a killing rampage.


Evil Dead 4: Luke’s Revenge.


The new Skywalker Trilogy

Luke Who’s Darkin’
Luke Who’s Darkin’ Too
Luke Who’s Darkin’ Now


Oscars: ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ Has Best Picture Potential (Analysis)


I hear Rob Liefeld likes it too, so we’re sweet…

*Hides behind all the chests and shoulders


Attack of the Moobs!


Do I have to use spoiler thingies? Ill do so, just in case.

[spoiler]Well that was pretty brilliant. I think I have fallen in love with Rey, she is the star in this. Finn was great as well as Poe Dameron.

Some very emotional moments, and this was not a cutesy movie. Some real brutality. Of the old cast, Leia was great. Han was Harrison Ford being the grump he always is these days, a tad disappointing, but his big emotional moment was one of the highlights of the movie. [/spoiler]